Diet

So I just checked out what the word diet is defined as. Before I tell you, take a second and think about what the word “diet” means to you.

***one second.

Diet: “The kinds of food that a person, animal, or community habitually eats.”

Is this what came to mind? My assumption is that you were thinking of diet in terms of “going on a diet”; following strict rules of what you are and are not allowed to eat with a certain goal in mind. Isn’t that interesting? A diet is what you HABITUALLY eat. The way that we currently use the word “diet” is almost inaccurate.

Let me get you thinking about something else… have you ever heard of “bad gas” in terms of putting it into a car? This happened to my sister a few months ago. She gave us a call saying that “my car is making a chug chug noise, I can’t accelerate properly and I just filled up the car with gas.” Our guess was that she got “bad gas”. Are you seeing the picture I’m trying to paint for you? My sister accidentally put “bad gas” into her car and it wasn’t running properly. Her car was not designed to run off this formula of gas. Have you ever thought about what you are putting into your car (body)? Why you may feel sluggish and not “accelerating” properly? I have been paying A LOT of attention to what I have been eating lately and minus some sort of food allergy/intolerance that I have, I have been feeling really great! Our bodies were not “designed” for all of the middle aisles of the grocery store. Stick to the outer aisles (fruits, vegetables, dairy, meat) and I can almost guarantee you that you will be feeling better!

Okay, this information is all fine and dandy. But how will I implement this into my life?! I have created a new page on my website where I will be sharing with you exactly how I have started to help myself. Check it out: feeding yourself with ADHD.

When you give your body the proper fuel that it needs, you too can run at your full potential!!Fuel + Body.png

p.s. I am so immature.. every time I would type “bad gas” I would laugh because I would flash back to the time my mom was explaining to my grandma that “[insert my sister’s name here] has bad gas”

As you know, everything in life comes at a cost; my schooling isn’t cheap! I love sharing my personal experiences and what I am learning at school with you! If you like my content, please consider buying me a coffee. Thank you for your support!

Buy Me A Coffee

Happy World Health Day 2018!

Did you know that it’s world health day?! I didn’t until I meditated with the guidance from my calm app! Tamara Levitt inspired me to write this post.

World Health Day

I feel like I have talked about this quite a bit but I will repeat myself because it is so important, this was my “health turning point”:

Today, it is April 7th, 2018. Let’s go back in time to the second half of 2016, beginning of 2017.

  • I was working 40+ hours a week, for not enough pay at an extremely stressful job where I was basically responsible for everything in a very small company. I am the type of person that will do everything and anything for you. All you have to do is ask. (I am working extremely hard on changing this!) This was my downfall at this company because the boss was extremely good at asking and asking and asking. Lets face it, I am a giver.
  • I was only exercising once a week atsoccer or ringuette.
  • I had moved out for the first time and was responsible for many new tasks.
  • I didn’t eat very well at all. I would come home and crash after a long day of work and basically eat cheese and crackers and then do takeout. I tried my best to eat well but it was extremely hard for me to plan meals, grocery shop and eat all the food before it went bad (I was eating by myself). I did have a boyfriend who helped me tremendously. I don’t think I realized how much he helped me until we broke up.
  • I wasn’t able to spend as much time as I would have liked with my roommate since we were on such different schedules.
  • The kicker: I didn’t know that I had ADHD.

February 16th, 2017 I had my appendix removed. In hindsight I think that this was my body screaming at me “stop being so mean to me, take care of me!!” Unfortunately, I didn’t listen.

I ended up taking minimal recovery time and heading back to work.

August 2017 (if I have the date right) I decided enough was enough. Everything piled up on me and I toppled over. I had just moved into a new apartment, the crazy job had just moved to a new location for the 3rd time in a year, my boyfriend and I officially broke up, I was so overwhelmed with work that my anxiety was sky high and I was starting to become depressed. I was SO OVERWHELMED and I was so upset with myself because I was quitting yet another job and I had no idea what I wanted to do. I also felt so incredibly alone and like “I didn’t belong anywhere”. I really needed the support of my friends but I don’t think that they understood what was going on and I especially didn’t. I was basically alone at an apartment for months. And this sounds like I’m exaggerating and I know that I am but that is exactly what it felt like. I needed someone to come down to my level and just be with me. The only way that I was able to spend time with friends/family is if I made the extremely difficult effort of getting off my butt. When I was out and making an effort I still didn’t feel like I belonged and I felt like I was trying too hard to be somewhere and do something that I didn’t even want to be doing.

You’re probably asking “what does this have to do with world health day”? I have spent my whole life neglecting myself, my body and doing and being what everyone else wanted me to be. This is the opposite of health. I know this also sounds extreme but I literally didn’t know how to make a decision for myself until I moved out and realized I would have to. All my decisions would be based on what someone else wanted. I didn’t want to be unhappy anymore, I needed to learn how to make decisions and be who I wanted to be. Listening to Jessica McCabe’s video “Failing at Normal” has literally changed my life. After watching her video and rea

lizing that what she said completely resonated with me, I asked my psychologist (since the doctor route didn’t work so well in the past) about it and I was diagnosed!

MY ADHD DIAGNOSIS WAS A HUGE HUGE HUGE STEP IN THE HEALTH DIRECTION.

My whole life I felt alone; I never understood why I felt so bad all the time and I honestly felt annoying because I was always complaining about my health and how I had another headache or how my jaw was killing me bla bla bla.

Ending the negative talk here. How have I helped myself in the health department?

  • By getting support for my ADHD (starting a support group and this Missleadingly ADHD blog, Facebook page , support group and Instagram account) I have now started to understand my brain so that Ican accept myself.
  • Signing up for ADDCA and starting my journey to become a coach. Let me just say that I did not expect to learn this much about myself! I am starting to understand my brain so much and I have explanations for things that I  didn’t even realize were part of ADHD.
  • I exercise daily and am on the path to exercising twice a day. This does not mean that I workout for an hour straight twice a day. Nope. Right now I am doing the Beachbody workout once a day and about 10 minutes on the elliptical in the morning to get my body going!Side note: I did not expect this whatsoever but the beachbody workout is helping me soooo much with my posture!! I have been getting headaches because it is activating muscles that I haven’t used but I am pushing through it because I can feel my body getting stronger and I feel a lot better (minus the headaches, of course!). 
  • Meditation. Now, I am absolutely brutal at meditating. I am probably concentrating on my breath and following the instructions for 2 minutes out of the 10. That said, I am getting so many benefits out the the 2 minutes! I feel so grounded when I start my day with meditation! Imagine what would happen if I was actually meditating for 10 minutes!! I want to also point out that I have no hope in hell of meditating if I attempt to do it before I exercise!
  • Gluten free/dairy free diet. I do not follow this to a T. For those of you that don’t know me too well, I am absolutely obsessed with cheese and bread. It has been extremely tough for me to cut it out. I have noticed a few changes in my body: I do not crash nearly as hard when I stick to the diet. How do I know? When I do eat gluten I crash and I crash hard.
    I also noticed something else that is really interesting: I do not understand how both dairy and gluten have the same effect but this is what happens: my hands, feet, shoulders, area near the bone underneath my eye, and my eyebrow bone all become irritated and they feel stiff. I usually notice this the most when I wake up in the morning. Also, on these occasions I usually wake up in the middle of the night feeling super anxious.
  • Baths with epsom salt, candles, relaxing music and bubbles! I used to hate baths because I would be so bored and I felt like I should be doing something else. Now, I love them! They really help me to relax my sore muscles and ground myself.
  • Essential oils. This has changed my life and I cannot wait to learn more about essential oils!! I am obsessed with Lavender oil and Peppermint oil in particular. Lavender really helps me to fall asleep and let my body know that it is time to get ready for bed. I want to also point out that I have tried a few brands and I have not found one that compares to Young Living. I have a very sensitive nose and I can tell that these oils are nothing but pure! If you are interested in learning more, yes I sell them. I am going to try my best not to use this blog to advertise myself as selling them. The tricky part is that I find them so amazing and hard not to talk about!!!
  • The most important thing that I have done for myself is for the first time I am actually listening to my body and respecting myself enough to ask myself “what do I want to do?”, “what direction do I want to head in?” and “will saying yes to this align with my values and what I want to be doing?”.  Abig piece of this is first learning about yourself, what works for you and then with those in mind moving towards what you want to do.
    I was raised to ignore all problems. Health issues are also seen as problems. Opening myself up and listening to my body is the hardest thing that i have ever done. It makes me extremely uncomfortable to address the way that my body is feeling and reacting but I know that this is my path to healing.

What do you do for your health? Is there anything that you ignore?

Buy Me A Coffee

Is giving 100% always a good thing for ADHD-ers?

This blog post has been building up in my mind over the past few days. What the heck am I talking about when I say “Is giving 100% always a good thing for ADHD-ers”??! Isn’t giving 100% always the way to go?

Let me give an example:

I just started working as a virtual assistant. One of my upsides and also my downfall is that I have to do EVERYTHING at 100%. I literally spent 15 hours on a project that should have taken me 5. Why did I do this? How did this happen? There was the option of doing it the simple way, 50% or there was the Alyssa way at 100%. Well, I ended up spending like 5 hours imputing all the questions (normal way) and then proceeded with a super complicated way to organize everything. Then it turned out that the super complicated way wouldn’t actually work so I had to spend even more time to re-fix everything. Insert total meltdown here. I ended up getting incredibly mad at myself and was battling with myself between stopping and giving up versus continuing. I ended up continuing and completing but it was rough! And for what?! I was not happy with the results and I still am not.

I did have a couple of options for the way that I could have accomplished said project:

1. Option #1: “half-ass it”. The thing with the half-ass option is it is the way the most people will accomplish the task and there is nothing wrong with that. Most people will see it as the “normal” way.option 1 or 2 Me? I’m not normal and basically can’t do anything the “normal way”.

2. Option #2: Do it the “Alyssa” way, the big shiny bright way. The new, fun way… I think you get the picture!

What I realized while I was chatting with a friend is that the giving 100% option is so much more fun and appealing to me. The end result will be nice, shiny and bright. On the other hand, if I do the 50% option (half-ass it) the process is boring, mundane, and very straight forward. I do not learn anything new and like I said, it is BORING. I also have a huge internal battle because I don’t feel as though I am doing my best.

When something like this happens in my life I always, always, always need a solution. So here it is:

Solution: 4 Steps

Ask myself:

1. What is the task I want to accomplish? What is the end goal?

2. What is the easiest way to accomplish the goal?

3. What is the Alyssa(hardest) way?

4. What is the happy medium?

–> #4 is going to be the option that I will go with moving forward.

The key will be to actually realize that I need to pause and ask myself “is this the way that I should be doing this”?

Let me quickly explain to you why implementing this solution into my life is so crucial. I put in all the extra work (realizing I wouldn’t charge for it) and was super disappointed when that time and effort was wasted. I wanted to throw in the towel and I essentially had a little “breakdown”. I realized that I still had a few hours to go to be able to fix the mistakes that I had made. I didn’t want to give more of my precious time away to this project. I had messed up by already giving too much of my time. I started to cry and feel sorry for myself (I am 26 years old, I don’t think this should happen lol). I said okay, time out. I took a bath and turned on my meditation app. In the bath I told myself all the positive aspects of what happened. I learnt A LOT about the task that I was given. To move forward I gave myself a little competition to see how long it would take me to get the task fixed. I put on some fun music and I kept on going! All this to say, the time wasted and the emotional toll that it placed on me was not ideal in the slightest bit. I would really like to implement my solutions to avoid the emotional breakdowns!!

Fun side note: My next chapter to read in my school manual is called “Procrastination, Perfectionism, Incompletions”. This should be super helpful for me to realize if this 100% is a part of perfectionism or just that I want to give everything; my all. 

Does this happen to you? Do you give 100% when maybe you shouldn’t be?

ADHD, Anxiety & Executive Functions

My diagnosis was the greatest gift I could have ever received. I’m not saying that ADHD is a gift, I’m saying that knowing that I have ADHD and finally being able to have an explanation is the gift.

Starting coaching school was the smartest thing I have ever done for myself. I am learning so much about how my brain works!!

I have had a few revelations this week. Slash this week has been one humongous set back.

Revelation #1
My ADHD is what causes my anxiety. How do I know? When my executive functions aren’t working the way that I would like THAT is what causes my anxiety. As an example: yesterday in class I wanted to speak up and share my thoughts. Then I was waiting to speak because someone else was speaking. What was I doing while I was waiting? I was repeating the question over and over and over in my head because I was scared that I was going to forget what I wanted to ask. And then I was scared that while I would be speaking I would forget what I wanted to say. This is where Memory #5 on the Brown scale comes into play (see below). These anxious thoughts, caused by lack of memory, activates my anxiety; my heart starts to palpitate, my body starts to shake and I “black out”. I can only half tell you what I even said. I really don’t know of a solution for this. If you come up with something, please let me know!

Revelation #2

Yesterday in class we learnt about executive functions and Brown’s scale. Here is it:

executive-functions-impaired-ADD-ADHD-1.png
The whole idea is that Activation, Focus, Effort, Emotion, Memory and Action combined form your executive functions.

So today is Friday and on Wednesday night I found out that a loved one of mine is going to have to get 4 rounds of chemo and get her bladder removed. I had just arrived home from dinner with a friend when I got the news so my bucket was full and the blow of the news didn’t hit me quite as hard as if my bucket was low. I think that it is important to point out that my body thinks that I am getting my period (my doctor and I agreed that I would skip my periods because my ADHD would become so intense otherwise). WELL, yes I am skipping my period but I can definitely tell you that my ADHD is in full force and my body still thinks that I am about to get it. I have been “haywire” all week; my thoughts (brain) run off on negative tangents and it takes my mind so much effort to bring me back to reality. Activation is incredibly hard, focusing is tough because of the negative tangents, the effort required for all activities I am doing is so frustrating, my memory is effectively not working and honestly, at least I think I am doing okay with the self-regulating. This is what is saving me from going into a total Netflix binge and shutting myself off from the world. Do you see how this can look like depression?!

So yesterday (Thursday) in the early afternoon, my loved ones got home from another doctors appointment and received more bad news. My loved one is going to have to go and see a specialist regarding her results from a test that could hint towards cervical cancer. BOOM. I lost all control of my executive functions. I could not stop crying, I was supposed to do work, I had a day of to-dos and I didn’t accomplish anything. My body basically went numb. I went to visit my loved one and it really helped to see her and to see that her spirits were incredibly high and she was going on with her life as normal. We also had a discussion about me living with her to help her out (enter anxiety because I realized everything that would change in my life; how much added responsibilities and how much harder things would be for me).

And now, today, Friday, I am extremely upset with myself because I did not do the work yesterday that I committed to doing. It is now a holiday and I am really hoping that it won’t get in the way of communicating with others since they will be “turned off” and in vacation mode.

I know all of this doesn’t seem like a revelation but it SO IS!! I now understand what the heck is going on. I used to think that I was depressed when this would happen; I would have no control over what I wanted to be doing and my body would shut down and I would want to go and curl up in bed and shut myself off from the world.

The solution

Pause, pause, pause and pause some more. I really have to be mindful and catch my thoughts before they head down a negative spiral. I have something to add to the pause since I am super visual. Do you watch “Friends”? There is an episode where Phoebe’s beeper keeps ringing and a friend of hers is calling that she doesn’t want to speak with. She ends up taking the beeper, putting it into a pot, closing the pot and putting it into the oven. That’s what i do with my negative thoughts! Yes, my loved one is sick. Yes, I want to fix it for her. The reality is that I can’t. So what do I do? I put my thoughts in the pot, close up the pot and throw it in the oven!

I would love to hear your thoughts and personal experiences with the brown scale & executive functions. Have a happy easter weekend! 🙂

 

Brain vs. Mind

I am SO EXCITED to finally get the chance to get these words written down and share my “aha moment” with you all!! brain vs. mind

If you follow the Missleadingly ADHD Instagram page then you have read that I have discovered there is a huge difference between your brain and your mind!

Why is this a big deal you may ask?! Well, it is so important because once you understand that your brain is your makeup and that it is almost out of your control, you can start to let yourself “be”. I say “almost” because you can also start to come up with ways of using your mind to reverse your automatic ways of the brain and almost trick it into doing what your mind wants! Also, when you know how your brain works you are able to understand the “why” and you can better shift your brain in the right direction and get it to work for you rather than against you.

Let me elaborate, I will give you some examples of our brains at work:

  1. Rumination: The brain needs to be interested & engaged. When it isn’t engaged, it can fall into rumination. This is where it gets tricky because our brain loves Ruminationrumination; the brain is engaged and happy. The trick is for our mind to catch that our brain has entered the rumination wormhole. It is also important to mention that our brain doesn’t care if we are entering a positive or negative rumination, as long as our brain is occupied it is happy! That said, our mind does not like negative rumination.
  2. Boredom: I recently learnt about ADHD & boredom. It physically hurts us to be bored. Now, this isn’t something that we come up with all on our own; this boredom comes from our brain, not our mind or who we are as a person. This is so crucial because we can feel like we are “less than” others or that we just have to try harder to get things done.

What is the point in telling you about our hurdles without giving you solutions to jump over them?!

Solutions:

  1. Rumination: The solution for this one is the limbic stop. What is the limbic stop? It is basically pausing the emotional part of your brain (the limbic system) and practicing mindfulness. This is how you pause (below is the pause model from my school):

    Pause – stop and be present in the moment. Breathe to expand your diaphragm & get oxygen to your brain.

    Pay Attention – Notice how your body feels and locate the feelings. Observe your thoughts.

    Process –  capture & articulate the array of emotions you are experiencing in your natural processing style.

    Pinpoint – Identify the specific emotion that is preventing you from moving forward. Ballistic or angry? Bombarded or anxious?
    Remember: name it to tame it!
    Then pinpoint empowering thoughts and feelings that will support what you are trying to do and who you are trying to be.  (I think this is the most important part)

    Plan & pursue – Organize and implement a strategy of action which plays to your strengths to overcome any barrier.

    ** notice they all start with the letter “P”? Also, I have an infographic for the “pause” from my school. If you are interested in seeing it, let me know!

    Tip #1: Set a reoccuring alarm on your phone as a reminder to yourself to take a moment and “pause”. Ask yourself: am i ruminating? Am I on task? What do I want to be doing right now?

    Tip #2: Create a pause button for yourself. Example: I am going to start to poke my belly button and that will be my way of signalling to my body “ok, we are pausing now”. If you find poking your bellybutton too weird, the spot could be one of your knuckles or your hip bone! Anywhere that you feel comfortable. Note: the spot doesn’t have to be on your body but it is easier because you will always be with your body!

  2. Boredom: The Time Timer really works for me! Here is a video on how and why it works so well for me. You can also have an accountability partner or a body double. It is important to know your weaknesses when it comes to boredom so that you can ask for help and put systems in place for yourself.

I gave you a few examples that came to mind but there are lots and lots of ways that our brain vs mind effects us on a daily basis! Our brain is on autopilot and drives us in a certain direction when our mind may not want to go in that direction, but since it is on autopilot that’s where we are going. Unless, our mind goes “wait a minute, no thank you. *Turns autopilot off and redirects*. Now that I have realized the difference between brain and mind, I feel like my mind and brain have been at war. My brain is tugging me in one direction and my mind is like “no, this isn’t what I want!”

Can you think of brain vs mind examples from your life? I would love to hear them!!

Walking on eggshells – anxiety style

From a young age I experienced migraines. This forced me to learn that too much sun, not eating properly, not enough sleep, stress and crying could set off a migraine.

Migraines caused my young self to be aware of the little things that can set off a migraine and until recently I honestly have a pretty great handle on them. What changed? I really can’t say. My assumption is that I have an allergy to dairy and/or gluten. In the mornings I would get an aura after having my morning tea and peanut butter on toast. I was aghast because I was following “the rules” and I was getting migraines. WHY?! This is what got my anxiety rolling. So much ruminating and trial and error came from these migraines. I had to fix it; prevent myself from this daily suffering.

Because I am in “fix it mode” I have such an unhealthy relationship with my anxiety right now. I am SO UNCOMFORTABLE with my anxiety and auras that I will do anything to prevent them. Which my assumption is, actually increases the anxiety. Everything I put in my mouth (eat) makes me anxious because I have no idea what will come from it “will i need to be close to a bathroom”? “Will I get an aura/migraine and have to go to bed”? Bleh. These thoughts overwhelm me all.day.long.

How do I get myself out of this loop?! I need to change my thought patterns.

walking on eggshellsI don’t even know what to think to be able to change my thought patters. I feel really stuck. HELP!

Right now I’m scared that since I have been awake since 4AM on only 5 hours of sleep that I will get a headache during the middle of the day or worse, be unable to control my emotions. I also worry that I won’t have time for a nap or that the nap will make me feel even worse. All this thinking is overwhelming me!

The truth is that I have no idea what will happen – I can only assume based on past experiences. I would really like to stop assuming and “just be”. Another thing: I need much better falling asleep habits. I was doing so well with using my calm app and meditating before going to sleep. That flew out the window and i need to get back into it! Now it’s like I have too many thoughts and ideas before I even can consider meditating 🙁

I’m in a little bit of a tough spot with my anxiety at the moment; I really feel like I am walking on eggshells all day long! I would love any ideas or helpful tips! Thanks <3

Stop and smell the roses

I was just reading about pausing in my school manual and I was also thinking about pausing while driving this morning. Do you stop and smell the roses?smell the roses (2)

Yesterday I had the pleasure of meeting my best friends baby! It was absolutely amazing 🙂 She is 5 days old and as you can imagine the cutest thing! It struck me on my 2 hour drive home that by the next time that I see her she will have changed SO MUCH. It broke my heart that I wasn’t going to be able to watch her as she grows as much as I would like. I realized that I was being negative and this was something out of my control. I came to the conclusion that I should appreciate the time that I do get to spend with her. I was able to hold her in my arms for at least two hours while I watched her make her little baby noises (including the cutest little hiccups you’ll ever hear!) and these adorable little faces while she was sleeping!!

This was emphasized by the reading I just did in my school material: ADHD-ers memories/triumphs “get buried once we complete them because we don’t pause to pay attention to them and celebrate the steps, the energy, the spirit, and everything that went into creating those successful moments”

Now I realize that this isn’t the exact same thing but I have a habit of jumping from one experience to another and not stopping to “smell the roses”.

This blog and my Instagram pages (personal and Missleadingly ADHD) really help me to relish the moments that are meaningful to me. This blog also holds me accountable to chase the moments that I really want in my life. Same thing goes for my planner! It is so easy to let time slip away from you. This is why I have post it notes that I put into my planner that I would like to complete as reminders to myself.
Example: I want to make sure that I don’t wake up one day and think to myself “WOW! I haven’t seen Madison in 4 months. She is so big now”. If I have a post it note in my planner then I can remind myself that it is important to schedule time to visit with Madison once a month. I have already been doing this with friends so Madison’s mom already has her own post it note haha.

Making memories is really so important! Don’t let life and your ADHD get in your way of basking in the light of past experiences and memories!

What GOOD memories do you have that are written in stone in your brain? Do you have butterflies that appear when you think of said memory? I usually do and I love my memory butterflies!

ADHD Coach – Session 1

So today I met with a really incredible Certified Life & ADHD Coach, Lynda Hoffman.

I read about this all the time happening to other people but this was the first time that I really felt like I could let my guard down and place myself in a professional’s hands. I have been incredibly hesitant in the past few months while i was trying to wrap my head around what ADHD was, how I can help myself and what I need. I would meet people and professionals who weren’t exactly specialized in ADHD. My own doctor was trying to prescribe me medication for ADHD while reading off a medication chart! I was beyond not okay with that!! I am also soooo into energy, feelings, vibes or whatever you want to call it. I get this feeling; call it anxiety, call it intuition, call it whatever you want. Basically it comes down to the way that the person that I am with makes me feel. I have such good vibes from Lynda; the perfect balance between “let’s get shit done” and staying in touch with your feelings. I can already feel that I am gravitating in the right direction!

alyssa chart (1)Let me explain the above chart that Lynda drew and helped me see.

The Brown

These two are what get in my way the most. They are holding me back at “0” or close to it.  Once I can get these two out of the way then I can really achieve my goals and be true to myself (soul).

  • Anxiety – This ties hand in hand with overwhelm. Overwhelm is one of my anxiety triggers. Unfortunately, overwhelm isn’t my only trigger for anxiety – but one step at a time here!
  • Overwhelm – When I have a lot going on at the same time I don’t know what to do or where to start because all of my thoughts are rotating in my head on a big loop.

The Purple – Soul (True Self)

Once all of these aspects are met, I will be able to move at full throttle in my y axis! For those of you that aren’t math friendly, that’s the vertical (up and down) line in the chart.

  • Being – I write a lot more about this below but basically instead of just being I was trying to fix myself and have a solution for all the signals that my body was sending me. I am going to try and “Just Be” rather than try and fix myself.
  • Balance – This one is so tough and huge for me. Once I start a new project, start a new job or anything is new in my life I become so wrapped in it and throw all of my energy into said project or experience. Unfortunately, I burn myself out and this isn’t good for anyone. I would like to learn how to maintain balance on a daily/weekly basis. Lynda gave me a solution for this that I am going to try! Right now my planner shows each day individually. I am going to print a paper that shows my schedule on a weekly basis to better demonstrate if I am doing “too much” of one activity or working too much (I am about to start a second job).
  • In My Body – This makes me so emotional because I didn’t realize how mean and cruel that I was being to my vessel that is carrying me through life. I also talk more about this below

Red/Orange

This is everything that I either have and want to maintain or would like to have in my life.

  • Support Group – have & want to maintain
  • ADHD Coach – started school, on my way!
  • Harmony – working on it
  • Friends/Family – have & want to maintain
  • Leisure reading – would like to start simply reading for pleasure again rather than only for learning.
  • Financially Independent – working on it

Through making this chart and chatting with Lynda, I realized that I was becoming so annoying and anxious trying to fix myself rather than just being. I was getting so overwhelmed by the auras that I was getting, the pain/tightness in my shoulders, my stomach issues that I went into hyper fix everything mode. This is what I realized to help change perspective:

My body & I are on the same team, at least we are supposed to be! Lately I have really been feeling like my body has been letting me down. I have never been comfortable with my body. No, not in terms of weight or looks but actually physically being present in my body. Due to my migraines, anxiety, and now stomach issues I have been wanting to escape more than ever. Lynda helped me realized that my body & I are one. Instead of fighting my body I need to work with it and eventually love it.

Lynda taught me this beyond amazing technique “hook-ups” to help get myself grounded. I made my first ever Missleadingly ADHD YouTube video to show you! And, let’s be honest, to help myself remember what exactly I should be doing. Check it out:

These are the goals that we came up with for myself in the next month:

  1. Breakdown how many work hours I will need to obtain my financial goals.
  2. Put the work hours into my planner
  3. Protect some empty spaces “what’s doable?” This is so that I don’t overwhelm myself and try to do too much!

Even at the end of the session I asked Lynda about what brain gym was and we used an example of how I feel while public speaking. My body was swaying back and forth. Honestly – as she was telling me that my balance was off I was telling her “this is my posture, I’m always like this” and then she said to me now think about your friend who just had a baby and how it makes you feel. I was so unaware at first but my feet were firmly planted on the ground, I was no longer swaying!! The power of positive thinking is beyond incredible!

The results that I saw in just one session are super exciting and also very inspiring since being an ADHD & Life coach is what I want to do!

 

When things are going really well and it’s terrifying

too wellDo you know what I’m talking about?? I get super excited over the little things and equally devastated when the little things don’t work out. Well, lately there has been lots of excitement and tons of little things adding up to big things!! I am now so terrified that something is going to go wrong because how can everything be so good?!

What’s the excitement about?

  1. I GOT A JOB!
    I have been holding out for months to find the perfect job for me. I know how ridiculous and unrealistic this seems. I am super fortunate that I live with my parents and they pay for my lodging and food. Yes, I am spoiled. This has been so incredible though. I have given myself the permission to find a job that speaks to me and makes me jump up and down with joy! And guess what…the wait paid off because I found something fantastic!
    What’s the job?! I am working as a personal assistant at a learning centre. No, this isn’t a place where students are being tutored. It’s SO MUCH BETTER! The learning centre gives students the knowledge to learn by themselves, the ability to make their own study schedules and actually study! The learning centre also holds their students accountable which in my opinion, is a HUGE plus! I wish I was a part of something like the learning centre when I was growing up!
    I have only worked 3 shifts so there is still time for shit to hit the fan but I am quite confident that it won’t! The vibes that I get from my boss are so genuine and the business that she has created fits exactly with all of my core values.
  2. I start school tomorrow
    In true ADHD fashion I registered for school to become an ADHD coach at ADDCA the day before the program starts. Regardless of when I registered I have done the first step to become an ADHD coach! I am so unbelievably thrilled to start this new journey. A huge reason why working at the learning centre is really awesome is because hopefully once I am a certified coach I will be able to have my own students at the learning centre and coach them! This is all “ifs” and “maybes” but it is still exciting to think about!
  3. Support Group
    The ADHD support group that I started back at the end of January is starting to really get on its feet. We have “regulars” which I have honestly started to become attached to. Whenever someone doesn’t show up I wonder why and how they are doing. We are getting memorable speakers, who are experts at what they do and are very knowledgeable when it comes to ADHD. We also have fun sessions where we have a set topic and let it run in whichever direction it ends up going. I really love this support group and it has made such a big impact in my life to know that there are others who are going through the same things.
  4. Friends & Family
    I have really made the effort to reconnect with all of my friends and family that I was close with and lost touch. Unfortunately, I literally have to schedule this time “call so and so” in my planner but that is okay because this is my process and how I know that anyone who is meaningful to me will not slip through the cracks of my ADHD brain!
    Spending time with my friends and family is so incredibly important and I lost touch with that for a period of my life. I was super bitter and had the mentality of “if they don’t make the effort to see me then they don’t really want to”. Well, guess what sour puss, it takes two to tango! Not literally, but you get what I mean! Now my life is so full and it is really great to know that I am surrounded by great people.
  5. Me doing an interview! 
    Last but not least, I had such a great conversation this afternoon! I was browsing through Instagram like I normally do when I saw a new message in my inbox. Long story short, I connected with an amazing woman (Cassandra) who is hosting an Online Summit! The summit has the best name “Heal Your Sh+t, Shift Your Life”. Turns out she reached out to me because she loves what I’m doing with Missleadingly ADHD and how I am pouring my heart out into these blog posts! She was looking for someone to speak about their personal experience with ADHD. So guess who will be doing an interview and talking about my adventure with ADHD?! Yours truly! I am still in denial and I feel like who would choose me to be interviewed?! But hey, this is happening and it’s friggen awesome! If one person can relate to my experience and feel better about themselves, I am a happy camper!So pretty please head over to the website and register for the summit. If ADHD isn’t your thing, there will be many others who are speaking on the summit. Here is what they will be speaking about:
    Healing and Shift Topics:

    Anxiety & Trauma
    Business Productivity
    Spirituality & Metaphysical Aspects
    Physical & Emotional Ties
    Nutrition
    Meditation
    Empowerment
    Money Blocks

    …and so much more!

    I didn’t tell you the best part… It’s FREE!! Here is a video for those of you that are visual like me!

I hope you take advantage of this fantastic opportunity to connect and hear from all these different speakers! Who knows which one will resonate the most with you!

Back to the terrifying realization that things may be going to well…I was txting my sister before and I told her exactly this:

I’m in such a good mood and everything is going to good for me right now that I’m like freaking out cause its too good to be true lmao

For some reason I need reassurance that I’m not in Alyssa Land and everything is allowed to be going this well. To be honest I think I need to convince myself that I am worthy of all of these great things that are happening in my life.  I would love your insight on this!! Do you get that feeling that absolute doom is waiting for you right around the corner? Because things can’t possibly be going as well as they are? Let me know your thoughts!